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Evernote Camera Roll 20151011 173800Someone once told me an old Indonesian quote “segalanya indah pada waktunya” which translates to “everything will be beautiful when the time comes”. Patience sounds so simple but it’s one of the hardest skills I’ve had to learn, and I’m still learning. It all started in Indonesia…

It was fasting month and most of my Indonesian friends, in Makassar, were going to spend a month without eating or drinking for 13 hours a day. They do this once every year and I wondered what it was like, so I thought about trying it for a few days. I ended up doing it for 8 days. Why? Because I loved what it was teaching me. I then did it the following year for a few days and I actually found out that I was more patient when I was fasting. I had to control my emotions and wait for the time I could eat and drink. I knew it was coming, I just had to be patient. I love how this event brings everyone together. You all wait to enjoy that moment when you can break fast. But what happens when you don’t know when, what you’re waiting for, is coming. How can you just wait and wait? To have patience for something like this is special and an amazing quality to have, to know that everything will be alright in the end.

But what if you don’t have that long. What if you don’t have until the end? Are you just going to sit and wait? My answer would be no. I want to live my life to the fullest and chase the things I want to do. Anything I can do I will do as fast as I can to get to the place I want to be. Or maybe I’m running away from everything that makes me unhappy. I’m trying to find an easy way out and leave the broken pieces behind. I guess this time I have to pick up those pieces and face up to what I’ve been ignoring.

However, if I did have patience would I have waited longer to travel to the amazing places I’ve already been? Would I have met the people I know now. I have had the most incredible, out of this world moments. Would this have happened if I had been patient and stayed settled in England for a bit longer? Maybe not. For me I will do what I can to get to the place I will be happiest and then find out how to deal with the other stuff later. I wonder, if I kept doing this would I learn how to deal with difficult times? I am a strong believer that everything happens for a reason and so maybe this struggle is helping me become a stronger and better person.

Just imagine a brick wall in front of you. You are trying to get over it but you can’t, you try to get around it, but you still can’t, so you break your way through it. You damage the wall and everything around you. You didn’t want to do that and hurt others but you had to. You needed to get to the place you wanted to get to. If you had patience maybe you would have waited for something to come along to help you get over or around it but that would have taken more time. You wanted it done straight away, but wait, damaging this wall has screwed up a lot of things and now you have to repair it. It’s gonna be hard. How do you do it? You’ve got to pick up each brick and start again. You have to put it back together. The end result won’t look the same, with all the cracks still showing, but it will still be there and people will start to forget that it was ever knocked down.